Wow, I might have to go back to being an alcoholic just to try this!
Showing posts with label Mark Borchardt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mark Borchardt. Show all posts
Saturday, October 13, 2018
Monday, April 30, 2018
Thursday, January 18, 2018
BORED
So tonite the alcohol withdrawal symptoms are hitting me really hard. It's like a white raging light blasting in my head and my blood is itching. My PTSD is sky high, and I need to figure out a way to calm down. It's always worse at night (which is usually when I drink).
I'll need to search back, but when I got into Mark Borchardt (back in November?) I would have this nightly ritual where I would get drunk and watch "Coven." I would start with NES gameplay of Drakkhen and then as the night wore on--and I became drunker--I would finish with "Coven." Usually at this point I'd be lying on one of the cats' towels or blankets on the floor upstairs in the den, and Onyx would be cuddling with me, watching too. I would end up falling asleep normally around the middle to end, but the main scene(s) I would remember was when Mark would be saying something like, "A little bit of you, and a few of you," while pouring pills into his hand and downing them with liquor. The subject matter (a struggling writer fighting alcoholism) coupled with my [drowning] problems--both literally and figuratively--would be just the thing to sink me into an easy slumber. I actually managed to spill beer on my tablet on two of these nightly occasions (it still works thankfully).
I am very lonely tonite. Jimmy's ignoring me and Kevin fell asleep a few hours ago. Ironically, I am used to being alone. I can usually deal with the loneliness by reading or going online, but nothing is doing it for me tonite. The weekend is approaching too, and that always amplifies my cravings... mainly because I know everyone is partying and I'm not.
I really hope I don't cave and regret it. I'd hate to call Morocco at 2am in the morning while drinking beer. And I don't know what I'm talking about; I'm crazy.
edited to add: It was Christmas Eve when I first saw his movie. I went back and added the tag, so it will be easier for me to find in the future.
edited to add again: I'm the girl tied to the bed, thrashing, in the elevator scene.
I'll need to search back, but when I got into Mark Borchardt (back in November?) I would have this nightly ritual where I would get drunk and watch "Coven." I would start with NES gameplay of Drakkhen and then as the night wore on--and I became drunker--I would finish with "Coven." Usually at this point I'd be lying on one of the cats' towels or blankets on the floor upstairs in the den, and Onyx would be cuddling with me, watching too. I would end up falling asleep normally around the middle to end, but the main scene(s) I would remember was when Mark would be saying something like, "A little bit of you, and a few of you," while pouring pills into his hand and downing them with liquor. The subject matter (a struggling writer fighting alcoholism) coupled with my [drowning] problems--both literally and figuratively--would be just the thing to sink me into an easy slumber. I actually managed to spill beer on my tablet on two of these nightly occasions (it still works thankfully).
I am very lonely tonite. Jimmy's ignoring me and Kevin fell asleep a few hours ago. Ironically, I am used to being alone. I can usually deal with the loneliness by reading or going online, but nothing is doing it for me tonite. The weekend is approaching too, and that always amplifies my cravings... mainly because I know everyone is partying and I'm not.
I really hope I don't cave and regret it. I'd hate to call Morocco at 2am in the morning while drinking beer.
edited to add: It was Christmas Eve when I first saw his movie. I went back and added the tag, so it will be easier for me to find in the future.
edited to add again: I'm the girl tied to the bed, thrashing, in the elevator scene.
Wednesday, January 17, 2018
Monday, January 15, 2018
I MEAN...
I made a Trump supporter friend and live-tweeted through a Mark Borchardt radio show. The universe is mine. #GoWitIt
Tuesday, January 2, 2018
Sunday, December 31, 2017
BECAUSE I NEED IT, MAN
I swear if I can't find more available content with Mark Borchardt, I'm going to kill myself, man.
Monday, December 25, 2017
MERRY CHRISTMAS (WHATEVER)
The movie we watched last night was called "American Movie" and it was about a guy named Mark Borchardt and his quest to make his first film. Spoiler alert: the film never got made, but he did make a 30-minute short called "Coven" (which I thought was very good). I followed the guy on twitter; he's very weird. I like him.
Today is Christmas and it's one of the worst. Kevin is sick as a dog and I'm fighting off a sore throat. The neighbors have been blasting shitty jungle music (it has the same throbbing beat) all day and some neighborhood kids got dirt bikes and atvs for Christmas and have been riding them all around our street. So it's been non-stop noise all day. I tried to lie down today to help fight off this cold, but it was fruitless. Long story short--we have shitty neighbors who like to ruin Christmas and really any day for the sake of their fun (which comes above everyone else's). I hope one of the kids have an accident. No offense, but it's illegal to drive off-road bikes in the street and they're not wearing helmets either. Fuck 'em.
I also had yard work I need to do this week. We got a letter from our association that we are in violation of a few things, namely: empty weeds from flowerbed, pull vine off porch screen, fix fence (from Irma), and open hurricane shutter on one window (we tried; it's stuck). I also am still looking for a good bit of earth for Buster's burial. And if I'm truly getting sick this is going to put a dent in my plans. Jimmy was also supposed to help me, but he's severely depressed and anxious about an upcoming interview he has on Thursday. I also have an appt. on Fri with the TMJ doc to evaluate my new nightguard (it's not working). So yeah, shittiest Christmas ever (and also saddest what with Buster being gone).
Today is Christmas and it's one of the worst. Kevin is sick as a dog and I'm fighting off a sore throat. The neighbors have been blasting shitty jungle music (it has the same throbbing beat) all day and some neighborhood kids got dirt bikes and atvs for Christmas and have been riding them all around our street. So it's been non-stop noise all day. I tried to lie down today to help fight off this cold, but it was fruitless. Long story short--we have shitty neighbors who like to ruin Christmas and really any day for the sake of their fun (which comes above everyone else's). I hope one of the kids have an accident. No offense, but it's illegal to drive off-road bikes in the street and they're not wearing helmets either. Fuck 'em.
I also had yard work I need to do this week. We got a letter from our association that we are in violation of a few things, namely: empty weeds from flowerbed, pull vine off porch screen, fix fence (from Irma), and open hurricane shutter on one window (we tried; it's stuck). I also am still looking for a good bit of earth for Buster's burial. And if I'm truly getting sick this is going to put a dent in my plans. Jimmy was also supposed to help me, but he's severely depressed and anxious about an upcoming interview he has on Thursday. I also have an appt. on Fri with the TMJ doc to evaluate my new nightguard (it's not working). So yeah, shittiest Christmas ever (and also saddest what with Buster being gone).
Sunday, December 24, 2017
XMAS EVE
Happy Christmas Eve. Missed dinner at the in-laws 'cause Kevin is sick. Opened gifts and watched the cats playing with their new toys and catnip. Now going to watch a movie quite like "The Disaster Artist" (don't know the name of it yet). It's a documentary about some guys trying to make a movie, but they failed so badly that the movie was never made. Very tired, though (I think I might be coming down with a cold too). Tomorrow we will open our stockings. It will be anti-climatic and depressing like Christmas day always is for me. 🎀🎄
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